Unrequitted

Why do I always have to feel this way? 

Isn’t it enough that I’m alive to live another day? 

In the grand scheme of things isn’t that what everyone wants? To live? 

Sometimes the smile is real, but so often it’s fake or forced. 

Why can’t I just be fixed and not broken? 

I know there are others who have it worse than I do, I’m so selfish and pitiful. 

I don’t want to be this way. 

I really try to do better, then my true self shines through and destroys any hope I had built up for getting better. 

I wonder what it will take to heal like I need to. 

Death? The ultimate cure. 

What’s wrong with me?